it's thursday, the 20th of september. tomorrow is 21st of september.
ENGLISH FYE
(for the impact)
the first day of sec 2 felt like yesterday. i suddenly want a rewind button in my life so that i'll live life with no regrets, just the way i like it. but that is completely out of the world. kuai le chong bai's playing. gosh. it reminds me of how in sec 1, we loved to dance to this song everytime it plays. actually, when any song plays. i feel like crying. stop. i must not waste
time. tears. energy. brain cells. i miss sec 1 soooo much. i miss primary school too. i wanna to go back to being a carefree person.
I WANT MY LIFE BACK!!!!!
argh. i just read a few posts bout today. and almost all of them were emo. guess we're really crushing under pressure. now this song kinda depicts what i'm feeling right now. sort of. i don't have the lyrics, but i just like the first part.
Coming Home by trevor nerva and julie sim (Share the Love)
never imagined it would be like this
all the time i'd fight you over and
answers were out
i was on my way
ready to say NO
don't let my feelings show.....
this song was in a cd given by my primary school. i think it's really inspirational, and every time i listen to it, i'll feel determined to study again. it can be considered my "study song(s)" so it's supposed to be a positive and optimistic song. never mind. i'm so messed up i don't even know what i'm talking about. sec 3 is approaching quickly but sneakily. i don't know if i'm supposed to be happy or sad. I went swimming today and took a walk in hougang mall. i kept looking at the time. i felt so different. i looked happy and even convinced myself that i was enjoying myself (this is the truest self-denial). but when i got home, i felt this heavy rock weighing me deep down in my gut. i don't know if it's stress, burden or guilt. but i just know that i deserved this night out. if i cooped myself at home studying, i might have just created a great scene at home. (exploding fireworks.)
Things i've been wanting to so much since forever:
1) DANCE (dance, dance, and more dancing)
2) watch tv. (without feeling like there's a mental alarm ticking inside me)
3) dinner at grapevine (this super nice restaurant whose brownies i've been craving for, and they just renovated the whole place!)
4) walk around orchard road (right now, i'll be satisfied even if it's just walking)
5) go back to kellock (i miss primary school which now seems as distant as my previous life)
and these were long overdue
6) pick up tap
7) learn piano
8) learn ballroom dancing
9) take up synchronised swimming
10) go on a holiday with my father
should update my wishlist. unfortunately, i have to read through the police report and some of the essays i wrote. for inspiration. hahaha. wonder how will my recent chinese compo turn out. ok time is running out and this bomb is about to detonate any time. tick tick tick tick BOOM!!!
*ok work hard my friends, even if i don't do well, i'd want everybody to!!!!*
Labels: bad days, emo days
got me singing like, nananana everyday, 8:27 PM.
